Ava Leonard, International Internship Program Seoul (IIP), Summer 2026
One of the biggest challenges I faced while living in Seoul was something I did not expect to be difficult: communication. I consider myself a very outgoing person. I am used to smiling at strangers, making small talk, holding doors open for people, and being comfortable starting conversations. In Seoul, I quickly realized that the way I was used to communicating was not necessarily the way everyone else communicated.
One of the first moments I noticed this was when I held a door open for someone and they gave me a confused look. In the United States, holding a door open is usually seen as a small, friendly gesture. I remember wondering if I had done something wrong. I also noticed that people generally did not smile at strangers as often as I was used to.
I noticed the difference even more on public transportation. On the subway, people were usually quiet, looking at their phones or listening to music. Coming from someone who can be pretty loud and talkative, I had to become more aware of my surroundings. There were moments when I would be excitedly talking with my friends and notice people looking over at us. I started to realize that public spaces were treated differently than I was used to.
I also noticed how people responded to embarrassment. I would see people cover their faces when they were embarrassed or uncomfortable. There seemed to be a strong awareness of avoiding unnecessary attention or putting yourself in a situation where you could embarrass yourself.
At first, I found these differences confusing. I even wondered if people were reacting negatively to me. Coming from an outgoing personality, I was used to getting positive reactions from being friendly and talkative. Eventually, though, I realized that I was viewing another culture through my own expectations.
Instead of judging these differences, I started asking my Korean coworkers and friends about them. I wanted to understand rather than assume. I also researched Korean communication and etiquette before and during my time there. I read about cultural differences and even watched videos and TikToks from people explaining Korean social customs.
As I became more comfortable, I adjusted my own behavior. I became more aware of my volume on public transportation, paid closer attention to body language, and became more comfortable with silence. I learned that not every interaction needs to be filled with conversation and that giving someone personal space can also be a form of respect.
Getting to know my Korean coworkers helped me understand this even more. I realized that being reserved in public does not mean someone is unfriendly. Once I got to know people personally, I experienced humor, conversations, kindness, and friendships just like I would anywhere else. I simply had to approach those relationships differently.
This experience taught me one of the most important lessons I took away from living abroad: communication is not universal. A smile, gesture, silence, or reaction can mean different things depending on the culture.
Living in Seoul taught me that being a respectful visitor does not mean expecting
everyone else to communicate the way I do. It means being willing to learn, ask
questions, observe, and adapt. Most importantly, I learned to appreciate cultural
differences instead of immediately judging them. That lesson will stay with me as I continue working with people from different backgrounds and cultures throughout my career.
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